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Some Good Advice

20 Jun

Thinking of cornfields in Ioway…d41aa368b64cd983a9ed51955eaff50b

Some Answers Are So Simple

19 Oct

I received this email from my friend Ginny today:

Ever walk into a room with some purpose in mind, only to completely forget what that purpose was?

Turns out, doors are to blame for these strange memory lapses.

Psychologists at the University of Notre Dame have discovered passing through a doorway triggers what’s known as an event boundary in the mind, separating one set of thoughts and memories from the next. Your brain files away the thoughts you had in the previous room and prepares a blank slate for the new locale.

It’s not aging, it’s the DOOR!

Whew! Thank goodness for studies.

Thanks Ginny for sending this so simple answer that explains all my senior moments!

I Love Simon’s Cat

13 Oct

I love cats.

In fact, I love cats so much that from the minute I could decide what type of pet I wanted, I’ve always had a cat beside me.

That was until my cat, Missy, died.

That was when two baby Sun Conures moved in as her replacement who (1) were as adorable as the Tequila Sunrises they resembled, (2) I taught to make kissy sounds and a few indecipherable words that only a Mommie could recognize, (3) liked to climb inside my shirt and nibble “peek-a-boo” holes while (4) making sweet chirpy, cooing noises to each other and if they were tired, (5) slept on their backs  cuddled together (first in a brown bag with the end rolled to keep it open and later in a PVC pipe hanging from the ceiling of their cage).

Otherwise were in no way cat-like.  In fact, they were bird-poop messy in and out of their cage, and developed the habit of screaming at the top of their vocal range just because they could.  At no point in their lives did they curl up at the foot of my bed or tuck themselves around my tummy when I was sick, or kindly cover up their messes and bathe themselves without splattering water on everything within a five-foot range.  They molted and had food flinging contests, and if the mood hit them, they could give you a nasty bite.  Most unsatisfactory, in the way of cuddly pets.

Yet I loved them for themselves and, not trusting a cat to snack on them, I turned to the canine world for some cat-like companionship.  Having never had a dog, let along raise or trained at dog, I was quickly trained instead.  The birds, however, I eventually sent off to live in a bird conservatory where they, each being female and having started to lay infertile eggs, could enjoy the amorous attentions of male Sun Conures.

However, while my three Yorkshire Terriers are, indeed, cat-sized, I still miss my cats.

Image my happiness today when I received an email asking me if I had yet discovered Simona’s cat.

Never having heard of Simon or his cat, I hopped over to YouTube to check them out:

This is so exactly like every time I’ve ever introduced a kitten to one of my older cats!

Now I can live vicariously through Simon and his cat companion without having to empty a litter box.

If you prefer your cats to be immobile, check out the books (there are three) on Amazon.

Help!! I’ve Fallen

17 Aug

Fortunately, I was able to get up, but I have to say, it was a close call.

I’ve been stumbling over my own feet for some time now, what with the ocean-in-my-ears equilibrium problem and all, but I had yet to actually land myself completely on the floor until today.  It was not graceful.

In fact, it was a battle to the end.  I must have twisted six different ways on my way down, trying to take everything on the night stand with me, which just gave me more stuff to land and die on.

I sprained my right wrist pretty powerfully, so I gave myself an infusion and packed it in ice.  I’m sending up prayers to the Divines Ones every five minutes that it doesn’t swell.  If it does, it won’t stop at the wrist and if it stops at the shoulder, I’ll be thankful.

I don’t even want to look at the huge welt I can feel on my right cheek, and said cheek is not on my face.

I bonked the back of my head, too, but since it was the last to meet the tiles, my momentum had slowed somewhat and it suffered the least damage.  Of course, it’s already so damaged, how would I know the difference, eh?

I hate to think it might be time to get one of those panic buttons to wear around my neck like a belled cat.

Aging is not for the faint of heart or weak!

Plastic Bags–European Style

19 May

From an email sent by my wonderful friend, Monica:

Are they just more imaginative than we are?


Thanks, Monica!

For more weird and silly stuff, visit Bored Panda, the only magazine for Pandas!

The Absurdities of Life

27 Apr

My friend, Susan, sent me this email today:

Food for thought:

  • Only in America…do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
  • Only in America…do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.
  • Only in America…do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.
  • Only in America…do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
  • Only in America…do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.
  • Only in America…do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

Do you ever wonder:

  • Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
  • Why women can’t put on mascara with their mouths closed?
  • Why you never see the headline, “Psychic Wins Lottery”?
  • Why “abbreviated” is such a long word?
  • Why doctors call what they do “practice”?
  • Why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons?
  • Why the man who invests all your money is called a “broker”?
  • Why the time of day with the slowest traffic is called “rush hour”?
  • Why there is no mouse-flavored cat food?
  • Why Noah didn’t swat those two mosquitoes?
  • Why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
  • Why they don’t make the whole airplane out of the same stuff used to make those indestructible black boxes?
  • Why sheep don’t shrink when it rains?
  • Why they are called “apartments” when they are all stuck together?
  • If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
  • If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the “terminal”?

Made me chuckle; thanks, Sue!

Good Clean Dirty Fighting

23 Dec

Definitely my idea of how one should conduct a snowball fight!

Thanks, Lil Kit — LMAO!

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