Thanksgiving Dinner Thanks

24 Nov

I have the dubious honor of being the one who will cook dinner for Thanksgiving this year.  My new casserole cooking skills, along with renewed ability to make grilled cheese sandwiches, have probably not prepared me for this task.  My gourmet cook step-mother, Annette, usually has the honor and, I must confess, I’m feeling a bit sorry for myself that she won’t be cooking this year.

So I’m on a quest to prepare a turkey, traditional stuffing, Annette’s French Canadian meat stuffing, mashed potatoes, gravy, my Grandmother’s fruit salad, and a pumpkin dump cake.  I’ll have to think about how to sneak some green veggies in there!

In honor of this exciting milestone in my life, and since I’ve only had commissions and no on-line sales since I moved my butt to Utah and moved my inventory to Storenvy, I’m offering a coupon for 25% off your total order (excluding shipping) that’s good through the end of November.  When you buy anything from The Dream Faire, enter coupon code THANKSKAT25 and be thankful you’ll not be eating Thanksgiving dinner at my house this year!


One Response to “Thanksgiving Dinner Thanks”

  1. gt281again November 25, 2013 at 5:21 AM #

    Mashed potatoes? I’ve heard of such a thing, it was whispered to me when I was but a wee lad by Antoine. ZE Antoine of New Orleans. A vile and disgusting concoction made with the unearthed tubers of a spud. Brown of skin, with multitudes of black unblinking eyes, they must be washed and scrubbed to cleanse them of the rotting and composted matter that they were multiplying in. And then…oh it is too disgusting to mention to such a fair Faerie Queen as you…they must…they must be skinned. Every ounce of their brown wrapping must be peeled away, only to expose a pasty white inner core, a pallid core of unremarkable starch that must be washed again to be presentable to a mere passerby, and should this misshapen oval be left alone for only the scantest of time, it will transform itself into an uneatable mass of black and moldy fibrous growth. Oooooh my Queen, what comes next could only have come from the torture rooms of the Marquis de Sade, these oval globes of unremarkable taste must be…must be, diced and sliced into cubes and boiled in the hottest of water, and once they have endured the unendurable and the purifying water has been removed they are beaten, pummeled and poleaxed into a gelatinous pudding. Then and only then can they be presented on a plate for consumption, but their taste is so unremarkable and uninteresting that they must be anointed with pads of creamy butter and cloaked in the finest of brown gravy, else they will congeal in one’s stomach, leaving no room for turkey, cranberry sauce and pecan pie…

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